At least a two-four of your favourite brewski. Don't be afraid to ask for more if your neighbour's in the bag and feeling generous.

Technically, not really a tool, but still borrowable nonetheless. And essential.
...especially if it's Sunday and you are missing the Super Bowl.

If you are having to fling wallpaper in the hallway while your friends are in the livingroom watching the playoffs, you've got a right to be tossing back a few yourself - and with no less enthusiasm. Thing is... you will likely find yourself being neglected in the bartending aspect while others enjoy the game and demolish your favorite snacks and brewskis.

So toss in a few off-handed hints once in awhile... like:

"What's the score now? ...I can't see the T.V. with this stupid sheet of wallpaper on my head. Boy am I parched!"

or...
"This wallpapering can work up a good thirst in a guy! Boy am I parched!"

or even..
"Hey... that sounded like a huge play there. That calls for a beer! Wadayasay! Wadayasay! ...Boy am I parched! "

Eventually, it will strike you that there is a premium on flying figs. Moreover, you will regret not having invested heavily in flying fig futures, because right now no one is giving them out - not a single flying fig to be had.

But before you give up in despair... try being succinct! Offer up one or two hundred of your Air-Canada or Stelco shares for a tall cool one.
Then stand back and watch those figs fly!


(Went fishing last week.
Caught 4 nice pickerel, 2 goldeye, and one big parch!